


I wonder what  it's like to be loved by you

by Anonymous



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Bottom Richie Tozier, Eddie Kaspbrak Loves Richie Tozier, Established Relationship, Fingering, I Don't Even Know, M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Post-IT Chapter Two (2019), Richie Tozier Loves Eddie Kaspbrak, sort off
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-29
Updated: 2020-10-29
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:22:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,463
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27254890
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Their lips move in a dance only known to them, a secret language that they’ll never exchange with someone else ever again. It’s laced with love, a certain kind of hunger of being forced apart for all those years, and a hint of desire that’s slowly overtaking Eddie’s other senses. His tongue dashes out, humming in appreciation as Richie grants him permission to lick into his mouth. Eddie cups the back of Richie’s neck, tilting his head up and simultaneously swinging his legs over Richie so that he’s seated into his lap.Or Eddie and Richie have sex and for the first time, they get to take their time
Relationships: Eddie Kaspbrak & Richie Tozier, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier
Comments: 2
Kudos: 89
Collections: Anonymous





	I wonder what  it's like to be loved by you

Richie, contrary to what his jokes might suggest, is not someone who has had a lot of sex. Before Eddie, before they kissed in a surprise move that left both Eddie and himself breathless and kickstarted the best part of Richie’s life, he had sex twice, and neither of those times were particularly great. It was dry, boring and unfulfilling and his partner ran for the hill when Richie proposed hanging out in his apartment after the deed.

It’s the consequences of keeping his sexuality a lifelong secret, but also because Richie never has never had any interest in someone before. His old college bodies struck at any opportunity to taunt him for the fact that he was the only one of them who preferred to hang around friends, rather than to take a girl home that couldn’t be pulled away from him. At first, Richie did his best to ignore the jets, but after a while he got embarrassed, and would sometimes go over to a girls house only to then pretend he had an emergency he had to attend to and leave before anything could happen.

He’s sure most people on campus realized that he was gay long before Richie’s coming out debut performance, rumors were always flying around and there was no doubt in his mind that his own failed hookup were also a subject, but he simply pretend nothing was out of the ordinary.

That being said, he did, on more than one occasion, longingly watch romantic movies and wished to be swept off his feet one day in the same way, but that would mean he had to find someone to love him first. Back then, that had seemed impossible. And besides, Richie had convinced himself, no one around him ever described it as ‘making love’ the way those movies did. The key words they used whilst talking about their experiences were either simply ‘getting off,’ or ‘fucking’.

One time, Richie lied through his teeth about all the sex he had, to a then upcoming performer that was competing for the same job in a radio station as Richie had, and who he wanted to look cool in front of. He must have imagined way too many niceties around the whole ordeal, because the man laughed in Richie’s face and called him out on all the bullshit he was spewing with no hesitation or apprehensiveness. The man made it clear that all sex was, was a way to get off, and that for most people, there were slim to none emotions involved.

After that, Richie’s expectations dropped below zero, and he resigned himself to live with an unfulfilled ache until he could find a substitute for it.

Eddie’s love for him is more than a substitute for it. The morning glint in Eddie’s eyes as he wakes up, curled upon Richie chest with his hand wrestled underneath the latter’s shirt is both calming and maddening, both a blessing and a curse as it forces Richie to wake up with a smile and have him take a few deep breaths to calm his racing heart. Even a year into their relationship, Richie can’t quite keep his reactions under control. It reduces him to acting like a teenager, Eddie reduces him to acting like a teenager.

He’s a sappy little shit, but Eddie loves him for it – at least Richie hopes so, there’s still that voice in his head hissing at him that if he doesn’t tone it down, Eddie will leave and he’ll be alone again -.

They laugh every day, and they watch movies that they then completely obliterate with stupid voices commenting in the background, and they go on dates and enjoy as much time together as they possibly can. They’re in love, and thankfully unafraid to show it. That alone is enough to quell Richie's thirst for anything more, but he doesn’t need to settle for anything.

He and Eddie have sex plenty, to the point where Richie perks up any time Eddie’s hands inconspicuously falls upon his upper thigh, squeezing as an indication that he’s ready for the night to progress. And by God, their sex is euphoric. It’s wild and mind boggling, and it has Richie leaping out of his seat to their bedroom before Eddie has the time to ask the full question.

But, but, there’s a heaviness looming, resting on top of Richie’s shoulders any time the two fall in bed together, that makes him tense, and unable to relax. Sex, besides feeling blissfully good, should be a way to relax or to l blow of some steam, or to intimately get to know your partner in a different way than you already did, but Richie truly well struggles with that that last reason. Every time Eddie’s cock drags against his prostate with a unhinged rhythm, the sharp sparks of pleasure overtaking his body, loosening his limbs and urging him to fall under a earth shattering haze of utmost pleasure, Richie fights back with his body and mind.

He’ll tighten the muscles in his body, teeth digging in his bottom lip to keep them from separating and pronouncing moans and gasps, and he’ll carefully make sure to angle his face away from Eddie, regardless of which position they’re in, so that Eddie can’t determine how much Richie actually enjoys sleeping with him.

Once they’ve both come, and the haze filters away from Richie's brain, he’ll dislodge himself from Eddie immediately, dodging his attempts to keep him in place, and showers himself clean. Only after that, when a little while has passed, allowing himself to cuddle with the confused man still laying in bed.

Eddie has no idea of his inner turmoil, has no idea that Richie both aches for the sweet relief of sex as much as he fears what it may result too. He’s terrified of the idea that allowing himself to sag against Eddie the way he wants to, to release his inner desires and vocalize them as much as possible, might make Eddie turn the other way in disgust. Maybe, Richie’s overly affectionate personality is too much for Eddie, and he’s glad that it doesn’t translate over to the bedroom.

Richie, per usual, never once opens his mouth to communicate with Eddie about this, but Eddie is smart enough to figure it out without his help. He did figure it out, imploring as ever, and now they’re here, in their bedroom late on a Saturday night, after Eddie’s insistence that he’s in charge of what will go down tonight, anticipation and fidgetiness coursing through their veins. Their bedroom is dark, with the only light source a tiny slit between their curtains that was left purposefully open to create a romantic mood. If candles weren’t such a fire hazard, Eddie would have used that instead.

Eddie observes him, from the corner of the bed, waiting for Richie to settle, to ascend out of his own mind so he’ll be able to relax. One word burns overwhelmingly on the tip of Eddie’s tongue, eager to address the person that means the most to him. And they don’t do this, ever really. They aren’t overly romantic, or a fan of cute little nicknames, but maybe they should be. Maybe Eddie’s ought to change that.

‘Sweetheart’, Eddie breathes, fingertips gliding over Richie’s reddening cheeks. They’re warm to touch, and magnify the fire burning in Eddie’s belly inherently linked to each the other. Richie gasps, eyes slowly, barely noticeable lifting up, until he and Eddie are staring at each other, until Richie allows Eddie to take a look deep into his soul. This is the first time, in all the times they had sex together, that Richie has allowed for it, the intimacy and closeness they share, to be drawn out so long. The nickname tastes sweet and sappy, and they affect Richie hearing it just as much as it affects Eddie saying it. 

‘Don’t call me that,’ Richie deflects, in a massive turn of the tables, turning even redder. It’s just another part of his ploy to pretend he doesn’t want the affection, but Eddie’s known Richie long enough to spot the lies from miles away.

‘Why not?’ Eddie still decides to ask, because he’d never intentionally do something to make Richie feel uncomfortable.

‘Because I-‘, Richie splutters, leaning back on his hands against the bed, fingers digging into the sheets. The flexing of his arms stretch his shirt, showing off the bulk of his shoulders more prominently. In his mind, Eddie imagines himself licking every inch of the tantalizing body part, but he shelfs the idea. Other things take priority first.

‘Because you’re afraid you’ll like it too much?’ Eddie inquires, realizing his mistake straight away as Richie becomes wide eyed, blinking rapidly underneath his glasses. Eddie doesn’t think, surging forward and connecting their lips. He’s trying to distract Richie, the question far too loaded and heavy to be answered on a spur of the moment, and it would defeat the purpose of what Eddie’s trying to do. The kiss starts out as a way to divert Richie’s attention, but Eddie ends up getting equally lost in the sensations.

Their lips move in a dance only known to them, a secret language that they’ll never exchange with someone else ever again. It’s laced with love, a certain kind of hunger of being forced apart for all those years, and a hint of desire that’s slowly overtaking Eddie’s other senses. His tongue dashes out, humming in appreciation as Richie grants him permission to lick into his mouth. Eddie cups the back of Richie’s neck, tilting his head up and simultaneously swinging his legs over Richie so that he’s seated into his lap.

With a gasp, the kiss is broken, and a flushed Richie breathes heavily with shocked excitement. His chest heaves, pressing against Eddie’s with every fast inhale. He seems unsure what to do with his hands, moving from where he had then pressed in Eddie’s side, to his upper back, long fingers curling over the edge of his shoulder over his shirt.

‘Holy shit Eddie, if you wanted me to get naked you could have just asked. No need for that kind of kiss, you already got me in the palm of your hands.’ Richie’s fake bravado is back, with a smirk and easy going commentary. He tugs at Eddie’s shirt, slithering back up to his upper back but this time under his shirt when it becomes clear Eddie’s not taken it off without help.

Eddie stops Richie’s hands before they can get up too far, squeezing once in reassurance. He shakes his head, dropping a chaste kiss to Richie’s mouth before lowering his head and pressing a kiss right under Richie’s jawline.

‘Not yet. We’ve got all the time we need Rich.’

Eddie skims his fingertips, barely detectable, across Richie’s arms. The featherlight touch causes Richie to shudder, so sensitive from barely any touch that it makes Eddie shiver too. His dick starts to perk up, spurred on by Richie’s reaction. Eddie peeks his tongue out to lick the same patch of his skin he kissed, a sort of marking to determine where he was going to place his hickey. The skin of his teeth gently scratch the spot as the only warning for what he’s about to do.

Then, after the warning, he digs in, just a little, biting into the flesh and sucking savagely, feeling the blood rush to the surface under his lips. Richie moans, interrupting himself before the sound can fully develop, so that only the first syllable bounces around the room.

The moan breaks down part of Eddie’s composure, and he moans right alongside Richie, shot up with a rush of pure want. Richie tilts his head back, allowing more room for Eddie to work with, but instead of moving on to another patch to mark, Eddie roves his eyes over the one, admiring what he’s done.

The mark is dark red, standing out against the otherwise pale skin that Richie possesses, a sort of signature Eddie left behind on him.

He absorbs Richie, noticing the hickey, Richie’s dilated pupils and the way his hair is disheveled, from combing through it with his fingers. Eddie becomes entranced, staring at the bulge in Richie’s pants that twitches the longer he takes his time.

‘Fuck Eddie please, get on with it.’

Richie scrambles forward to kiss Eddie, intensity dialed up to eleven. Happy that Richie is enjoying himself as much as Eddie is, he grants him five second of pure bliss and hopes that things will speed up, before pulling back with a dazzling smile.

‘I got to choose what we do today remember?’

‘Yeah, but I didn’t think you’d turn all sappy on me Eds. If I would’ve known it would take this long, I would have jerked off in the shower beforehand.’

‘If you don’t like it just say stop okay? Sweetheart.’

Richie’s moan reverberates through the room, no concealing the way he enjoys it. He averts his gaze timidly, embarrassed that there’s no way of hiding how aroused he is. 

‘You’re going to fucking kill me Eds’, Richie whimpers as he races to undo his shirt. Eddie lets him, digging in to the exposed skin as soon as there’s available room. The shirt gets tossed over to the other side of the bed, with Richie too wound up to properly discard it.

‘Come on, take yours off now too’, his voice breaks on the final vowel, caught off guard by a particularly sensitive spot on his chest that Eddie tongue transcends over. Eddie stops, retraces his steps, and while he initiates eye contact, laps over the same, tender place.

In response, Richie sinks to his back, shifting in a way that trips Eddie up as well, and attempts to connect their mouth with a newfound determination. The angle and speeds at which Eddie falls forward however, has him sliding down too low, so that Richie’s lips are aligned with the crown of Eddie’s head, and Eddie thunks against Richie’s shoulder. An ache develops for just a moment before it fades away and Eddie begins to chuckle.

The snort of laughter Richie lets out is a little breathless, and he instantly takes advantage of their position to curl around Eddie, hiding his face in his neck. ‘I ruined the mood now didn’t I?’

Eddie’s chuckles die out, and he shakes his head vehemently. His fingers reach up to slide into Richie's thick, curly black hair, and use his grip to guide Richie’s head back, not hard but insistent nonetheless. He waits until Richie allows his head to be moved, and then bumps their noses together, bearing witness to a dazzling smile overtaking Richie’s features. ‘Of course not. You could never ruin anything.’ He repositioned himself to be hovering above Richie leaning on his elbows,

And it’s true, their moment of interruptions has not made Eddie any less desperate to get his hands on Richie, his dick is still perked up to attention and his fingers itching to bury themselves in Richie’s tight hole.

He kisses down Richie’s chest, stopping to suck at his left nipple, closing his mouth around the bud. At the same time he nibbles gently on the bud, gently because Richie deserves to be treated nicely and Eddie intends to deliver on that, the hand that is not currently still winded in Richie’s hair, slides down to bulge of his cock. Richie’s gotten semi-hard since they’ve begun, but he’s not nearly fully there, and Eddie is determined.

With pants neatly fastened over Richie’s hips, there’s not a lot of friction Eddie can give. Still, the chocked whimper that erupts from behind Richie’s teeth proves that he’s relishing in the moment, despite the limited range of the touch. He fondles over the bulge indulgently, feeling how Richie’s cock is starting to thicken in his grip.

Eddie tries his best to multitask, but focusing between two things is hard, and he’s worried he’s not making it the best that it can be. He switches to Richie’s right nipple, gnawing at the bud too forcibly. Richie hisses in surprise pain, and Eddie licks over it apologetically. ‘Sorry’, he heaves when he pulls back to catch some air, doubling his efforts over Richie’s cock by grinding down with the palm of his hand.

If Eddie’s not mistaken, there’s a wet spot now, on the exact place of the head of Richie’s cock. ‘It’s fine, I hurt you first. Payback’s a bitch I gues-s’, Richie tries to maintain his usual smart-assery, but it’s undercut by the whining tone of which he says them. Eddie doesn’t grant him a response, instead nosing down, seeking out the exact spot Richie’s heart is at.

Richie’s chest hair tickles his nose while he caresses the spot, but he simply digs in deeper, baring his teeth to redden the patch of skin he’s trying to leave a mark on. Richie heaves, nearly dislocating Eddie from his position, but even that seems hot in the moment. Eddie grinds against Richie's leg, once the pressure of his own cock gets too much to bear, for a short moment of relief.

‘Please’, Richie whimpers, back bowed to get closer to the sensations produced by Eddie’s mouth. He doesn’t elaborate on what he wants to happen, but Eddie can fill in the blanks on his own.

‘Okay Richie. Okay.’

‘Wow, I had no idea that the way to get you to do things for me is to say please. I should try to use it more often.’

Eddie reaches over Richie to their besides cabinet, where he knows they keep a sustainable amount of lube and a package of condoms. It was Eddie who went shopping last, so he’s exactly aware of the brand of lube they currently have at their disposal. A fancy one, with strawberry flavor and subsequently scent. 

Eddie hums, at last locating and grabbing the lube in his hands. ‘Sucking up to me won’t get you anywhere Rich. But hey, feel free to try.’ As Eddie helps Richie to worm out of his pants and underwear, a shiny trail of precum gets left behind on his thighs, glistening and a clear sight even in the darkish haze in their bedroom.

Richie doesn’t get wet all that much, all that often, at least not as far as Eddie has been allowed to witness, so this truly is a sight to see. His dick slaps against his tummy, fully erected and begging for attention. In any other instance, if Eddie thought Richie could hold out for that long, he’d trace every vein and every grove before blowing him, but he’s doubtful Richie could stand holding off that long.

Eddie strokes his finger, coated in strawberry flavored lube, over Richie’s hole, again and again and again, until Richie stops pistoling his hips upwards and falls pliant to the bed. As soon as he lets his legs fall open aimlessly, Richie relaxes his whole body, and Eddie slides a single digit into the hilt. He stops, takes notices of Richie hitched breathing, bearing down on the finger and wiggling as if it’s going to get him more, faster.

The squelching sound his finger makes as it slides in is inciting, the urge to replace his fingers with his cock is insistent, but Eddie withholds, adjusting his pants and squeezing once in reward for his immeasurable patience when it comes to his own lust.

On the bed, Richie twitches, moaning in frustration when he begins to grind his hips down to speed things up, but Eddie continues to slowly slither his finger in and out. He wants to take his time to pull Richie apart from the inside, seeing as he hadn’t yet gotten the change to do that before.

‘Oh fuck, oh fuck’, Richie mutters, unaware that’s speaking out loud. One of his hands delves into the pillow beneath his head to brace him, the other wraps loosely around Eddie’s forearm, following the motion Eddie makes.

‘Are you ready for another one?’ A frantic nod is all he gets as reply, desperate for more. With two fingers the heat and the soft inner walls are more prominent, and Eddie has to bite back a moan of his own.

He slides a second finger alongside the first, pausing to allow Richie to adjust, while he distracts Richie from the wait by initiating a searing kiss. The kiss is mostly just the shared conjointly of air, because both Eddie and Richie are panting heavily. His fingers are ever searching for the one bundles of nerves in Richie’s body that will launch the sex to a whole other level, and grins followed with a happy ‘yes’, when he locates it.

As soon as the pads of his fingers trace over Richie’s prostate, Richie yelps, going taunt and cross-eyed. On the next inhale Richie keens, torn between moving into the sensations and away from them.

‘Yeah is that good?’ He inquires, but he already knows the answer from the way Richie’s eyes are rolling to the back of his head.

‘Fuck Eddie so good.’

Eddie scissors his fingers, opening Richie up bit by bit and preparing him to be fed his cock. He let’s up Richie's prostate after a while, when Richie’s dick turns red and he swats away at Eddie’s hand when it encloses around his cock, ready to begin jerking it.

‘Just fuck me already’, Richie says, lurching upward to get easy access to Eddie’s pants and unzipping the zipper. Eddie chuckles, taking over as Richie’s hands shake too much to properly open it.

‘Okay sweetheart, I think we’ve both waited long enough huh?’ He unwraps the condom and puts it on, slicking it up as he strokes his cock, eager to move things further. By some unknown grace, Richie has progressed past the point of caring about how much he lets it show that he’s enjoying this, with his head tilted backwards, opening his neck as an invitation, and his mouth aloof.

Eddie scoots forward, taking hold of Richie’s legs and maneuvering them so they wrap around his waist, and he has easy access to slide in. He pecks Richie’s lips one last time while perched over him, and strokes a piece of hair away from his eyes.

‘I love you’, he whispers with a tenderness he doesn’t verbalize nearly enough, searching to make eye contact before he sinks forward, his cock being swallowed inch by inch by enthralling heat.

Richie keens so loudly Eddie is half convinced their window will break on impact, but he’s right along with him groaning. Once his cock is buried inside Richie’s body, he pauses to let them both adjust, but once Richie clenches around his cock, he goes hazy, and his eyes flutter shut.

‘Can I move?’ Eddie grunts, grinding his hips barely detectable against Richie’s tailbone.

‘Please.’ He doesn’t need to be told twice. The permission unlocks something in Eddie he didn’t even know he had, thrusting in Richie with vigor. Never has any kind of sex felt this good.

Eddie can’t hold himself upright anymore, not with the glorious sparks of pure pleasure overriding his logical mind. The spot where Richie’s neck and shoulder meet becomes the location he rests his head, suckling lightly at the skin as a distraction to hold off for as long as he can. As embarrassing as it is, he’s at the verge of spilling within seconds of their fun beginning.

Richie, in turn, seems just as turned on, his dick now lying in a pool of its own precum as he flails around widely, his thighs beginning to quiver where they’re wrapped around Eddie’s waist.

The atmosphere around them is electric, warmed by the love that is so omnipresent it’s almost palpable, and the extortion from the rhythm in which they’re moving.

‘Shit Rich you sound so good.’

‘Is that… Is that allowed?’ The words sound so hesitant Eddie slows down his thrusting, which gets a pleading cry in response from the man below him. ‘Do you not think that’s weird?’

‘Huh?’ Eddie questions, out of his mind with the pleasure of fucking into Richie, though it’s more of a grinding now than anything else.

‘To you know… do that?’

Eddie laughs despite himself, overwhelmed with happy emotions and urged on by primal instincts. ‘To moan? You can do anything you want to sweetheart, as long as you enjoy yourself.’

Richie flushes, but he doesn’t break their eye contact, even as Eddie gradually speeds up again. At least, he doesn’t until Eddie manages to hit his prostate after a hard thrust. It’s good, so fucking good, but Eddie thinks he knows how to make it even better for Richie.

Right as Richie sobs forward, actual tears falling from his eyes and bowing his head so he can be even closer to Eddie, the latter grabs his head, tugging it backwards at the same time he strokes his cock, and the fun is over just like that.

Observing Richie’s coming is something Eddie tries very hard to commit every detail off. he’s still staring at Eddie, but it’s like he’s not there anymore. Like he’s floating outside of his body, caught in an ecstasy so high he can’t process it. His muscles lock up and go limp all in one breath, and a moan is stuck in his throat, reverberating around the room. Cum splatters everywhere, on Eddie’s fist, and over Richie’s stomach and even chest. It’s a mess, but Eddie loves it. He loves Richie. 

Eddie, still fucking into him, reaches his breaking point not long after Richie. Mere seconds after Richie, his own orgasm splashes over him, rocketing him off the face of the earth. It’s so intense it almost hurts, a continuously sizzling and stretched out buzz that is too much to keep baring. As soon as it’s over, he collapses on top of Richie, oblivious to the mess between them.

It’s quiet for a full minute, nothing but their heavy breathing, before Richie can’t take it anymore and has to defuse the tension.

‘Wow, I didn’t know it was supposed to be like this. And here I was thinking your mom gave the best sex.’

‘Oh sweetheart,’ Eddie murmurs, seeing the joke for what it is. ‘I love you so much okay? I love all of you, every part. Even the things I complain about. I just love you as a whole.’ Richie blinks away tears, but Eddie is kind enough to let it fly under the radar.

‘I love you too’, he answers back, bringing their lips together and hugging Eddie closer to his chest. For the first time, Richie feels no pressure to get up as soon as possible.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time ever writing something nsfw (as I'm sure you've noticed) so please let me know what you think but don't be too harsh please!


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